 Image by Jill Wellington from Pixabay This question reminds of a similar question that I asked a former professor of mine which was, "How do we, as Psychologists, make people happy?" She looked at me and said, "We don't, they need to make themselves happy." She shared stories of her time in private practice specializing in depression. Specially, how she learned overtime that people who want to be happy take charge of their own desires and outcomes. We, as Psychologists, she said, cannot control their choices. I remember feeling shocked by her answer. She told me that with depression, brain chemistry can change if we teach our clients to practice happiness. Of course I asked her, "How?" She mentioned that we must retrain our brains to enjoy life by using simple steps to gradually reduce their negative feelings. In other words, recharge the brain. For example, doing something that we enjoy, (i.e., eating ice cream or traveling). This allows us to focus on positive thoughts and feelings which in return, helps us to change negative thoughts to positive ones and enjoy those moments of happiness. I did not understand that in graduate school... Yet, here we are 17 years post-graduation for me and in the world of positive psychology, mindfullness, yoga, and surrounded by life coaches. Now, I understand. It is very simple psychology math, take a look below:
My former professor's plan interrupted the distractions by adding positive interventions before one searches for confirmation bias. At least, that's my analysis of her approach to depression. She gave her clients homework assignments to enjoy things they value the most including a timeframe and frequency of engagement. I have to agree with my former professor; I do believe that using positive and healthy interventions to increase happiness works to alter brain chemistry. It also increases our motivation to change our behaviors. Once you successfully create and follow through with building happy goals for yourself, then you will feel more inclined to want this emotion more often and maintain it. The endorphines happen more often and form a habit. Who does not want a habit of feeling pleasant feelings and happiness? "What Is Happiness?" Happiness is a subjective state of well-being. It includes positive emotions and feeling content and satisfied with a positive evaluation of one's life. It is a feeling of joy, pleasure, and fulfillment that arises when a person achieves a desired outcome, engages in enjoyable activities, or experiences positive relationships with others. Happiness means a well-developed sense of meaning and purpose in life, as well as a positive outlook and a sense of hope for the future. Happiness may be influenced by external circumstances such as relationships, material possessions, or achievements. How Dr. Lisa Maintains Her Own Happiness:? I smile, often. I smile at my family and friends. I smile at my clients. I say hello to others. I am polite and friendly to most people within my environment or community because it makes me happy. Pleasantries can trick your brain into thinking that it is happy. When I am unhappy or distressed, I talk about it. I do not hold onto my negative feelings. I take breaks and relax when necessary. I listen when my body tell me to slow down. I do things that I enjoy, (i.e., buying myself gifts and pampering myself). I believe in prayer and everyday is a new chance to do things differently including starting over. I try to forgive others and move forward with my life. I do not harbor resentment or hold grudges against anyone. One of the greatest lessons that I learned about happiness is to remove things and people that do not add value or joy to my life. I try to enjoy every moment. "Peace Be Still" is my favorite Biblical quote. "How Can I Get To Happy?" You have to want to be happy. Happiness is a subjective experience, and what brings happiness to one person may not necessarily do the same for another. However, we can all take steps to bring more joy into our lives. Here are some general suggestions that might help you find happiness:
Conclusion Happiness is not a destination that can be reached and then forgotten about. It is an ongoing process that requires consistent effort and attention. By making small changes in your daily life, you can increase your overall level of happiness and improve your quality of life. Be patient with your self and enjoy the process. You only have one life, make it a great one!  Image by Sasin Tipchai from Pixabay
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