Blog 60: "A Child's POV"

A Child’s Point of View (POV)
Child One: It’s scary to see ghosts. I’m in a dark place and see dark images of people and it especially happens at night. I see large, dark shadows and they come toward me when I am in my room alone. I’ve been seeing them for quite a long time. This is not new for me, but they’ve been scaring me since I was little. I told my parent about it, but it was denied, and my parent did not believe me. It was all in my head or not real, but it was real, and it is still real.

I try to not think about it, but I’ve seen ghosts my whole life. I do not talk about it much because I was told to leave it alone and to not tell anyone.  So, that’s what I did, and the dark spirits still torment me. They hold me down when I am asleep on my chest and will not let me up. I cannot breathe or stand up. When I try to scream out, I cannot because I am scared. I try not to move or fight because the torment gets worse. When I can’t move, I feel as if I am asleep. Maybe I am asleep because it feels like a dream? Except, I open my eyes and see them, and I know that I am not sleeping because they walk around my room, and I see them at school sometimes. They are dark figures like shadows, and I can see through them.

Child Two: I see dark figures. I used to see a man; he was dark with glowing eyes, and sometimes I still see his eyes glow. He has been around me for a long time and I see him in my house sometimes. At night, several dark shadows will come around me and not leave me alone. Then, I have times when I black out and see only darkness. The darkness is quiet, and I cannot move or call out to anyone. While blacked out, I see myself laying down. I see my body. I feel as if I am awake, but I am watching myself. I feel as if my body floats to a place that I am not aware of, but it’s dark and has red in it or something red glowing in the background. It kind of reminds me of death because I wonder sometimes what death is like and what happens to the body. I wonder what it will feel like to die and I talk about ending my life just to see what will happen. When I sleep, I feel as if I cannot get up and it gives me a feeling of how people feel who die. I do not have a plan to die, and I know I will go to hell if I kill myself, but I really want to know how it feels. I kinda know how hell feels or looks like because of the dark place that my spirit goes to when I sleep or see myself sleeping; hovering over my body, although I am awake. I think the dark spirits do it that to me, make me want to do dark things.

​I told my parents about dark angels and the other things that I talked about, but they do not take it seriously. They believe it’s television that I am imitating or learning how to be dark. That’s not true and I do not play with Ouija boards or anything. They just come to me, so what my parents think it not true. These are ghosts and they do show themselves to me. The one that’s been around me the longest is 7ft tall and just stands there without moving. My family believes in prayer. I pray inside of my head, but not aloud. They pray out loud for me, but the demons stay around in my head. It feels more effective when I pray in my head because they feel as if they go away. But, when my family prays for me, my body starts to quiver, and I feel heavy. I cannot walk and my body just shakes uncontrollable sometimes as if something is happening to me that I cannot control as a result of them praying. What is happening to me? What is this when I am touched by those who pray for me?
I stare off in space and it happens when I am seeing dark things. People think I’m weird, but they do not see what I see. I see dark ghosts, but they look like shadows.

Recently I learned the name of the ghost that had been around me for the longest. He told me his name and now I can call him by his name. I do talk to ghosts. I talk to this one because it is nice to have him around because I am not lonely. I have lots of friends, but at night I get lonely and this ghost who is mostly silent, does talk to me occasionally. He has been with me since I was a small kid and grew with me and he is taller now. He has always talked to me. I prayed last night, but I did not pray for him to go away. Some of the same things happened when he was around last night, that happened in the past and he was talking to me. I’ve been talking to ghosts for a long time. Sometimes I see them, sometimes I do not but when I am laying awake in the bed, he is always standing beside me. He is with me now as I talk to you. He has glowing eyes and is right behind me. Now that you prayed, he is gone. I have not seen God’s angels because I did not ask for God to send them to me. I did not ask for my friend to be removed either. I have to think about asking for him to go away for good. They do have wings, some of them.

Dr. Lisa: There are some commonalities between the children’s stories along with some of the things that I’ve shared that kids who could see ghosts told me years ago. Patterns of showings are the same such as ghosts appearing as little children and growing up with them overtime. These children have the most spiritual activity at night with ghosts and both consider the ghosts as friends. I decided to share with both kids that I write about children who can see ghosts, and each one allowed me child to share their stories. Something magical happened after I disclosed my blog to the children; they came back to me and told me more about their childhood journeys with seeing ghosts. That trust is an amazing feeling, and I am thankful that I was chosen by these kids as their person to talk to about their sightings. 

​What I learned from these two children is that I need to keep writing and talking to them about how dark angels are not their friends. I still need to continue to study the reason(s) that some kids get attached to ghosts and how ghosts can be important figures within a kid’s life - to them. Clearly, child two would like to keep the friendship with the ghost as opposed to permanently removing it. At times, my mental heath alarms are raised high over the things that I heard from these two children, but I still need to learn to be less transparent in my facial expressions. That might sound funny, but it’s true. None of us are perfect and it is important for me to remember that there is still a lot to learn. For example, there was one question that I was unable to answer from child two:

​Why Would God Allow Someone to Murder a School Full of Children?
Answer: Free will.

​However, I still have a lot to learn.
My hearts, prayers, and love go out to the Robb Elementary School Families in Uvalde, Texas.
Tragic.