Blog 40: Silent Children

Silent Children
In the mist of our daily lives, there are times when we make the choice to silence ourselves, or keep our thoughts and opinions a secret. We function under the premise of less is more or, silence is golden. There were some Nebulous Children who learned how to socially function without their circle of friends and family knowing about their ability to see ghosts. Then, there were some Nebulous Children who shared that they could see ghosts, but did not want to deal with it - at all. Some Nebulous Children remained silent about their ability to see ghosts. I call these children, "Silent Children."

Conversations with Silent Children were the most difficult for me. You see, these were the children that would not admit to seeing ghosts, or talk about it. I knew, however, when I encountered a silent child due to their behaviors and interactions around me. I learned from numerous Nebulous Children and parents, various traits that all Nebulous Children possessed. I could observe a silent child, for example, watching around me or giving the appearance of listening to something that was talking to them in their ears. Silent Children also knew things that non-Nebulous Children did not know in the paranormal world, especially about me. By observation of their behaviors, I knew when Silent Children could see the angel behind me, for example.

Child H
I tried to work with Child H many times. Often, I could see Child H receiving messages from something out of the window. Child H would stare out at the trees and then look to me when done. Child H would not reveal that a conversation was taking place, but I knew that these conversations could transpire internally and without facial recognition. In other words, Nebulous Children can talk to ghosts without us knowing about it.

Nebulous Children told me numerous times that they could hear ghosts when no one else could do so, and talk to them telepathically. Communicating telepathically with ghosts is what Child H would do in front of me. Periodically, Child H would get angry with me when it was obvious that I was aware of what was happening. I handled Child H by looking out at the tree or school grounds with Child H while asking questions, or just allowing the view to happen with Child H in silence.

Child H was an angry child and much larger than me which meant that I needed to be very cautious while working to restore this child's emotions back to baseline. It was not easy and Child H did not make it pleasant at all. Child H jumped up at me once, but I did not move. Child H cursed like a sailor at me one day; and I was every name under the sun, but I was unbothered. I was not giving up on this child until I had to close the case. Child H was considered legal within Child H's state of residence, and the parent could not force educational testing or psychotherapy. This parent wanted the help for Child H and considered me a good match with Child H, but Child H did not appreciate the assistance at all. Child's H's mother was disappointed and shared that Child H had been discussing the ability to see ghosts for many years.

Asking Child H if she or he had the ability to see ghosts was a moot point. This was a defiant kid and remember, it is a question that I do not ask children. Children must talk to me about seeing ghost on their own when they feel safe. Although I was certain that whatever Child H could see increased the anger, I could not prove it since Child H was a silent child. I used to try a few things: If Child H continued to look behind me, I would ask what Child H was looking at behind me? The response was usually minus any idea that the ability to see ghosts was there, or that anything was wrong in Child H's daily activities and/or emotional stability.

One day, I walked into a classroom to try to pull Child H out of class for educational testing, but Child H refused to go with me. This was a new behavior because Child H usually worked with me, and complied with most of my positive encouragement. At that moment, I sat with Child H as Child H looked out of the window and began to talk to something. I watched Child H for awhile, then asked Child H one more time to come with me. Child H said no after it appeared as if this child was receiving information from outside of the window. I told Child H that it was fine not to go with me, but obtained Child H's assent to contact Child H's mother to let her know that Child H rejected. Gaining a child's assent is not necessary when they are in primary and secondary school, but it is always nice to make sure that the children are ok with your plans. Recall, Child H was an adult but had not graduated high school yet. I wanted Child H to feel as if I respected the rejection of services, but also established that Child H could trust me. Child H's mother was not happy, but understood the reason that Child H did not want to continue with services. She complied with Child H's request to terminate services, which ended the therapeutic relationship with Child H.

​My Learning
Child H taught me that even when I had the best intentions, Nebulous Children may keep their ability to see ghosts a secret from me, as did Child H. I am positive that Child H could see ghosts, and I have been aware of other children's interactions with the paranormal over the years. I trained some children to keep their abilities silent because of the reactions that they shared with me from society when they disclosed their gifts.

Why did I teach them silence?

It was too hard on them emotionally, to tell their friends and family when they did see a ghost. That silence was not just hard for the kids, but for me as well. I know that healing comes in the form of talking, and I wanted these children to be able to share their experiences with their families. I wanted to celebrate it with them as long as it was healthy and void of dark angels. Unfortunately, I had to share in the joy silently with some Nebulous Children. As long as their mental health improved, including an increase in academic grades if that becomes problematic, I was pleased.

Honestly, there were plenty of Nebulous Children who remained silent about their ability to see ghosts with their parents. Of course, I would rather for them to tell their parents. Some tried and their attempts were rejected. No, I could not disclose the ability to see ghosts unless it was harmful to them, others, or they were being hurt. If you made it this far in the blog, then you know that I had to disclose it a few times. By talking about their abilities, children felt free and relieved that someone would listen to them without judgement. This taught me that it was perfectly fine to address their mental health other ways for example, view photos or drawing pictures of the ghosts that were seen. I had plenty of pictures of ghosts drawn by children within my career. What I appreciated most of all was consulting with parents to determine if their children were improving, from their perspective. Determining ways to help Nebulous Children at times, came from trial and error. However, the one thing that I learned the most was simply,

​Not All Silence Is Bad.

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